even if it kills me.

HILARIOUS MESSAGE TO BE INCLUDED.

It was hard, without them. It always was. Some nights he wondered how he'd ever lived alone for so long, after over a perigee of having his friends a hallway's distance off almost all the time.

Of course, he'd has his lusus then, and a wider world he could sit back and look at from afar, he guessed. But now that he was accustomed to this smaller world and their part in it, it hurt more than he liked when he couldn't be around them when he wanted to. Annoying to realize that he actually missed them, as much as he would have prefered not to.

Right now this was applying far more to Sollux than to Terezi. Terezi, at least, was just a bit awkward. Almost in a good way, really. It was just hard to function normally when they'd gone so far out of the normal. Hard to settle back into the usual when the usual didn't seem to apply anymore. Sollux though...Sollux he couldn't even bring himself to talk to properly without his chest just aching with regret. He couldn't even decide whether to be angry or ashamed of himself.

It was Sunday night, and he was sitting in the biodome, contemplating things. He hadn't wanted to stay cooped up in his room any longer, constantly wondering if Sollux would come by to try to say something to him. The anxiety had gotten to be a bit much. The biodome was a bit more open and, honestly, peaceful. Legs folded in front of him as he sat by one of the rivers, he was starting to wonder why he didn't come here more often.